Year 2010

I just missed writing my own thoughts, I had been out a while and not able to update this blog of mine. While looking back of Year 2010, although its not ended yet, I remember the life that passed on me. I can say that Year 2010 is not really for me.

I experienced the saddest thing in my life. I had been in a place and I lived there in 11 months, it was a beautiful place for many people but for me its the loneliest place I had ever been.

I never enjoy my work not because I am tired of it but the real essence of my work is somewhat vague.


I had been far from family and friends, and away from my nature adventures.

Year 2010 may not been really good to me, but I see hope before it ends. New life comes into me and I look forward that the life I had were a trials to me.

I survived year 2010 and I learned a lot of things in life.

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On my own now

For several weeks passed and up to this moment, I am currently being tested in this life. This is the time there is so much hardship and pain. This is the first time I experience and still experiencing to be scared in my life and my future. This thing does not involve career, but this involve a more personal thing. How I wish life can be more kind to me. But I cannot blame the things happened to me to anyone but to myself. Maybe not even blaming myself, just think that life is just the way it is.

I am struggling, having pain inside of me. There are times that I want to surrender, there are times that I want to stop. Sometimes, I wonder how will I survive this situation I am having right now, sometimes, I think whether I can pass this. I don't know what to hope, I don't know what to think. All I know I am living in this world with uncertainty. I am trying to be strong,. I need to be strong. I have to be strong not for myself but for my family.

This is the real life...it's not always happiness, most of the time its the contrary of it.

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